Have you ever tried to plan a hen do? A group of relative strangers who are all linked via one person. It is not easy.
The older you get the more difficult it is to plan things.
To organise x amount of people with different things going on in their lives, sometimes it is practically impossible.
I have about 6 Whatsapp groups where we all try and meet up. Most of the time it is a text from Jess saying are you still up for Saturday. I have completely forgotten that I had plans but then I just end up going.
I used to be worse!
Completely dysfunctional; I forgot everything. But this isn’t anything this is my hen do.
Snow Boarding group!
I am having a few: one in Madrid (my favourite city at the moment), A Hag do in London/France Skiing and another Hen in Essex. This way all mine and Gavin’s friends can attend the ones they are available for and can afford.
It sounds excessive but my sister lives in New Zealand so won’t be there until a week before the wedding. She is a bridesmaid so that’s why I am having an Essex Hen Do. Plus, the elders can attend that one.
Hen Dos are expensive
We are having a few, goodness knows how I am going to save for them.
I don’t really believe in your hens brunting all of the cost. I don’t mind them paying for drinks and the odd meal but not flights and accommodation.
Becky’s Hen do Edinburgh
I have organised one hen do, been part of the creative side of my sister in Law and attended a fair few myself.
My best friend gave me a list of 44 people.
I was freaking out about what that many people could do and stay. Luckily it was a small group of us that went away and a larger group that attended the London hen do.
Still there were cross words, tears and I am pretty sure one hen never paid me. Guess that’s my fault for not being more organised.
One of the biggest issues is people not getting back to you. Dongle the organiser was a great help for picking the date but still I only had people’s emails to deal with.
My dyspraxia means that I tend to read an email and answer in a very straight forward way. Which can come across as abrupt, blunt sometimes rude. I don’t mean it. I read emails at face value, without a tone and certainly not between the lines. Some of the hens didn’t understand this. I had to explain myself to them and as soon as I talked about my dyspraxia they understood my reply’s.
All in all, we had an amazing Hen do in Edinburgh, caught up with old friends, drunk lots of booze in our old haunts. Walked up Arthurs Seat! Had afternoon tea at the Dome (you have to do this) did some touristy bit too. Scotland rocks!
But I made a lot of mistakes.
Abi’s Hen do Munich
So, with this info I am going to aid my organiser
Becky told me where she wanted her hen do one drunken night so when it was my turn, she asked me where I wanted to go. First place I thought of was Madrid.
Hot, sunny, beautiful Madrid. I loved it there and can’t wait to go back. Gav is off to Krakow which I also adore but there is something magical about Madrid.
Flights and accommodation can be sorted out for less than £200 so it would be the same price staying in the UK.
Things I learned from hen Dos I have been to
- Organisation is Key
- Let people pay for themselves
- Respect people budgets
- The hardest part is finding a free weekend
- People don’t respond to people they barely know
- There is a lot of pressure on the person organising
- We are adults, let people be
Organisation is key
in planning a Hen do it doesn’t matter if you have 3 or 44 people leaving things to the last minute doesn’t work.
Let people pay for themselves
I get that sometimes people find it easier to pay on one credit card and then people can pay them back later. But that puts the stress on one bank account. I couldn’t afford to do that so why should other people.
Respect people budgets
We all have different pay check and budgets, respect that some people can’t afford everything. You invite them because you love don’t make them feel bad if you can’t afford it.
Sam’s Hen Do, Penfest, yes those are dark clouds!
Finding a free weekend
I have set the date and given everyone 11 months’ notice. If they can’t make it I understand but almost a year should be plenty of notice especially for dates and also to save.
People don’t respond to people they barely know
I have also taken it upon myself to invite the guests on my Facebook account. I have done this so Becky doesn’t have the hard task of chasing everyone up. After collecting money, I found this the hardest. The yes/no’s the last-minute cant makes it’s made me book a place, then cancel it loosing my booking fee and paying for a cancellation.
The person organising is gold
Becky is just looking after one hen do. She is then organising with the girls to see do the final details that I am not allowed to know about she has two rules, no strippers and no penis anything!!! She is a super star but I know it will be work for her.
Sam loves Tennis, Penfest
We are adults, let people be
I mean it. If you can’t make, I totally understand. If you can’t afford it, I really do understand. If you just don’t fancy another hen do then don’t come. If people want to go to bed early, let them. If they don’t fancy dancing till 3am I don’t blame them.
My bed time is normally 10pm.
I am not getting involved in my hen do anymore. I will leave the planning to my bestest.
All I want is lovely wine, great food and my friends.
A perfect hen do for me.
Have fun with your hen do and treasure those who are helping. They are gold.
Jess and Crispin’s Hag Do, Drink Shop Do