The stress has eased and now I am just grateful

Advice, Personal Experience, Planning, self care

I feel better now

I do

I have been having a few rants and stresses lately. I know when family get involved it can all get a bit much but it’s important to know that they are here for you.

Mine have been amazing

And when I say my family that also includes my friends and people that are in my life.

I have said before that me and Gavin are very different. He hates excluding people and always feels like the bigger the better. He also welcomes new friends into his life all the time. I never have to worry about being late because Gav will have made a friend at the bar or on the way in.

He is so welcoming and I am but not as much. I don’t go out of my way to make new friends because the friendships I have had for years are so precious to me. I don’t get to spend enough time with them so without being horrible I don’t need more friends.

I hold them close to my heart and I would do anything for them. And I know that they would do the same.

The stress has eased. It may have to do with the fact that we have got a lot done. The list has halved. Things have been ordered and arrived and there are just a few makes left to do.

Monday is a prep day

Tuesday is a family day

Wednesday is when I completed the seating plan

Thursday is organise the house day

Friday is set up day

Saturday is the day

It’s almost here and it’s too late to worry about things that are out of my control.

Dear Mother Nature please don’t rain!!

My friends and family are banding around to make this day magical for me and Gavin. I took out my mother in law and mum for a prethankyou so that they would know how much there roles in my life mean to me.

I am feeling really grateful that one, Gav decided to marry me and two, that my friends and family are here to support me and Gavin.

Because we need it.

We need them here with us. I am starting to get excited now!

Today I ate my feelings

Advice, Personal Experience

I know there is no point getting stressed getting worried about the never ending list won’t solve anything and nor will eating my feelings

I thought I would be better at this.

Dealing with the stress.

Being organised.

It turns out when it comes to wedding planning, I am definitely a dysfunctional planner. I feel like I have left everything to the last moment and now its all getting on top of me.

I am lucky that I don’t suffer with anxiety. I have dark moments and blue days but nothing like the crippling anxiety I know that so many people struggle with day to day.

Except at the moment it here.

A lead weight in my chest. A dark hole in my brain that wants to shut down rather than get active.

I may just be tired, physically.

I know there is no point in getting stressed. I am actually on top of things and I still have a few weeks to go. 3 infact. And I can accomplish a lot in those weeks. Especially as the last one I am not at work at all.

But today I was quiet all day and I got so many side glances at work I knew they thought something wasn’t quite right.

Compulsive eater: saga of eating my feelings

Today I ate my feelings in the shape of Krispy Kremes. The first was a treat. The second was pure indulgence and the third was me dissolving into myself. Filling that void with pure sugar and eating it so quickly no one, not even myself could stop me. I crammed that thing into my mouth and it didn’t change a thing. I don’t enjoy it and I didn’t regret it.

Whenever I am angry or sad I crave bad food, today was not different except I am not sad but numb.

Numb and stuck.

I went to the gym for an hour this morning and then I destroyed my calorie intake in 9 bites.

I have support.

Every time I even hint I am stressed I am inundated with friends and family offering support and physical help.

I know what I need to do.

But I am stuck inside my own head and it’s a very quiet grey haunted place. To quote Bono

Stuck in the middle and you can’t get out of it

I will go home tonight, cook dinner and achieve a few wedding bits.

I will get a lovely puppy greeting and cuddle. A kiss from my fiancé a discussion about food and drink. Watch a few episodes of My Kitchen Rules Australia and Great British Bake off. I will read a bit of my new book as I tuck myself away for an early night at 10pm.

Pull my socks up and get on with it but it’s there.

tomorrow I will probably be fine before the next bout of anxiety nibbles away at me.

I am only writing this out loud because if anyone else is in the same situation then they should know that even though people don’t speak about it much it happens a lot.

Like I said before I don’t normally suffer from it all. I am truly blessed in that my mental health is pretty, well healthy.

Feeling a little overwhelmed, does every bride go through this?

Advice

I am not ashamed to admit I had a little cry at work last week. Time is ticking by and there is still a lot of things to organise.

It is easy to say that I am feeling a little overwhelmed and stress is the cause. A proper first world problem but still a problem.

Does every bride and groom go through this?

I am guessing it’s a yes, unless everything is being dealt with by a wedding planner then anyone in the same situation as us will be.

Because our site is a field we have to organise everything, everything! It’s not hard it just means we have to be organised and I feel like it’s all on my shoulders but it’s not.

Gav is doing his fair share! I am on top of the majority of my DIY makes and the majority of them look great. But the amount of little jobs that I can’t really hand out.

Still so much to do

All the little jobs are adding up now and I have had a lot of friends reach out and ask me what they can do to help.

I have taken them up on it.

I said at the beginning that when people offer help it really is because they want to help and be a part of it.

I called my dad. Mainly because I miss him and to ask when he is arriving. I told him I was stressed. His first words were

“Why are you stressed?

What can I do to help?”

I love my dad. He just said the exact right thing. I had been talking to my sister in law about a few things. Asked my mum to bring over the cheese ( she lives in France!!!) and am chatting to my sister a lot.

Alexa rallied them all up and had a chat with them. Then we all pulled our socks up and got on with it. I am very proud to be a PAYET! We are all awesome.

Family help

I have support in all sides. Gavs family is here when ever I need them and We have already involved them at every stage. Papa smurf my father in law has actually made me a fair few props and they have come out so well that I may ask him to make a few more!

Stress

I don’t want to be stressed on our wedding day! I just want to enjoy it. I have been looking forward to this moment my whole adult life and some of my childhood too ( thank you Disney).

I just wish my family were a bit closer than the other side of the equator!!

because I organise events as part of my job I did think it would be a lot easier. It isn’t really difficult there is just a lot to manage. But we have 4 weeks now.

So I made a big list.

A super list

And already I have crossed things off!

The importance of a canapé: food issues

Advice, food, Wedding

So having been a wedding guest a few hundred times, kidding, I know how important it is to feed your guests! A happy guest is a happy wedding.

Pretty sure the number one complaint from your wedding guests are that they are hungry, cold or thirsty! They are basic things that should always be covered. Everything else is just about timing.

For us

We are getting married outside whether is rains or not! So when it comes to our guests they will wrap up accordingly. When it comes to our bridal party we need to look after them!

The weather we don’t have any control over but drink and food we do! Weddings in the UK are usually at lunch time which means that you may have a big breakfast but from then to the wedding breakfast is normally a good 5 hours. I have been know to put a few snacks in my hand bag.

Now I have had amazing canapés ( friggin steak which melted in the mouth) quails eggs dipped in Bloody Mary salt! I still dream about those canapés and I have had weird ones, as well as no canapés.

When you are hungry and waiting it is so important to feed your guests and keep them happy. Like a nice glass of pimms and a cold beer! Lovely!

Because we are hiring a food truck we don’t really have the option for canapés so we still need to feed our guests without filling them up.

Cold food is going to be the easiest choice but deciding on that has been tricky.

I refuse not to serve canapés and Gav agrees. I hate it when you sit down and they is a tiny bit delicious warm roll and you devour it before your starter comes.

Speeches drag if you don’t have happy guests.

Getting the right balance is hard! You want them with a drink in their hand but not drunk! You want them to have rated something but not full.

You want happy guests who can focus on enjoying the day without complaining that they are hungry or tired or dying for drink!

Don’t get stuck in a fitness rut: Gym tips I still need to listen to!

Advice, body confidence, Fitness, Uncategorised, weight loss

I used to go to the gym 3 times a week which looking back wasn’t great but something is definitely better than nothing!

But I was stuck in a rut!

When they ask to introduce you say yes!

I never went upstairs and I never really explored the machines when I should have. Gyms always ask you if you want a walk through and actually you should take them up on that offer!

I should have walked round and learned about all the machines.

I also should have walked round and understood that I need more than a few exercises to see results!

Don’t get stuck in a rut

This is what Jon taught me. He said when you come to the gym there will always be a certain amount of people who are there all the time but you never see a difference in them.

This is because they don’t change up their routine enough. They get stuck in a fitness rut of comfortable exercise and can’t get out of it.

Now there is no harm in this. Maintaining your weight and fitness is important but unless they change up there routines and add different elements to it there body it going to stay the same.

I am a hundred percent guilty of this. I am definitely a creature of habit. I like the running, rowing and bikes. I may through in a different machine if I am feeling brave like the CrossFit or step machine but most of the time that it’s.

Plus I run home.

So my muscles are doing the same thing all the time which means although they are getting stronger and I mean a bit more toned I haven’t seen that much difference.

I didn’t want muscled arms so I stayed away from weights.

Now I want to introduce them into my routine. On Monday I did bicep curls and upped my weights each time. This will help work on my arms and bingo wings which I do need.

You need to do a bit of everything if you want to see improvements.

I am still working on a fitness plan that I can follow without being a slave to it!

Preparation is key

Pack your bag the night before! If I don’t do this I waste 5-10 minutes every morning when I could be at the gym. I have forgotten my locker key, towel (twice) shoes, you name it.

My skincare and shower bag now live permanently in my bag so I have to get them out on weekends.

When it’s hot it’s easy as I can just pack a dress! But as it’s a little cooler this week I have to focus on outfits.

If you are showering at home the. This doesn’t apply to you but I go straight to the gym then to work! Preparation is key to this and here is where I really need to listen to my own advice. I need to plan my outfits and check I have my towel with me!

Gym tips

I can’t give you any real fitness advice because I am just starting out and it would be wrong to do so! So if someone talks about your fitness at the gym listen to them. Ask for advice book a PT everyso often.

Keep it fresh!

Also you don’t want it to become boring! You need to challenge yourself! Up your game each time. But mostly you need to do this for the right reasons. You need to do this for you, not to get in your wedding dress, not to look Instagram ready.

Do it for you

I am doing it for me. The goal was my wedding but I want this to continue for my body to be a healthy happy place.

Need to Tarte up my Make Up bag!

Advice, Beauty

First impressions

So I said in my last blog that I am working on my hair at the moment! This curly girl method appears to be working with the plopping.

Sounds so good doesn’t it.

I said that makeup isn’t really a priority for me but that doesn’t mean I am not interested in it. My last makeup trial went really well and I have booked Kelly for my wedding yay. She made me look and feel beautiful!

Which is all I wanted.

Happiness

Plus Gav and my mum were happy. It’s not long now till I walk down the fricken isle. Sorry wee bit excited then.

My friend Jess keeps telling me how good I look recently which is so nice to hear and I have been wearing a wee bit more makeup. I also think it’s just my happiness showing through but who knows.

So I decided to treat my self to this! It was on offer on QVC and has subsequently gone up to £60 which is a lot so I thought I would give my humble first impressions review.

Firstly the packaging is gorgeous! I love it. Everything looks well made and the eyeshadow pallet is the stuff of dreams.

Make up bag

I already have my palm tree makeup bag so I don’t need another one, however I am going to use it for my brushes. Because I have 3 now and they definitely need there own bag… I am such a joke! This is wear all my tools will live. Beauty blenders and eyelash curlers etc!

The lip gloss

Oh how I hate lip gloss what is the point of it? Really it’s sticky and makes your lips look shiny. It generally doesn’t hydrate your lips that much! Give me a Lanolips or Vaseline any day.

So I didn’t like the colour of this. It’s a neutral which again I don’t get. It smells yummy and was nice but I think my sister or mum will get more use out of it then me.

I bought this set for 3 things

The foundation is supposed to be amazing! and as I don’t normally wear it I would like to play with. This also comes with an application brush which excites me no end.

I wanted the brush a lot

The third reason I bought it was the eye palette. The case is me to a t! But the colours are quite soft and neutral. This meant that I can actually have a play with the colours.

I am out of Mascara so that was a blessing in disguise!

I haven’t tried anything but the lip gloss but I can’t wait to sit down on Sunday and give it a try.

Summary

So I am pleased as punch with my order. I think it is a really beautiful make up set. Tarte isn’t a well known brand over here so it’s a really great that I can try it without spending a ridiculous amount.

I will let you know how I get on with it!

Makeup plan fail! Passport photos trying not to look like a pyscho!

Advice, Beauty, confidence, Travel

So I lost my passport and it’s been stressing me out. First world stress obviously as it’s for my hen do trip in just under 4 weeks.

So I thought hell I know I could write a little blog on what I did to prepare. Like a get ready with me plus prep.

I was so happy with how I looked a little extra mascara a bit more blusher. Umm no still looked like a pyscho.

Pre-care pamper session

So the night before I thought about it. I used the Philip Kingsley Eslastizer on my hair as a treatment rather than just a pre wash treatment.

Frank had a bath first of course. He gets jealous if I spend too much time in the bathroom. He loves a hot bath but I have to cool it down for him incase he cooks.

Any goo back to me!

Skincare

Used my Omorovicza cleanser. It’s gorgeous balancing luxurious and light. At the moments it’s replacing my Elemis, especially in the mornings if I was want to wake up rather than indulge.

So I haven’t used my baby facial in a few weeks. I was using it twice a week and then reduced it to once. I love it. I don’t find it too strong on my skin. I have had a few hormonal breakouts so my skin has been pretty grim.

I used my baby facial.

I love this stuff. It goes on and you feel a slight tingling and leave it as a mask for 20 minutes and wash it off.

Applied a wee bit of Matryxal because it’s my favourite product ever I think!

Then you are left with baby plump skin straight away and in the morning!

After I applied that I used my Guerlan night mask just to give it an extra bit of cushioning.

Pre care hair and skin done!

Morning of the photo shoot ha ha

The next day I woke up to lovely skin. Myi was so happy. So I decided as this image has to se me through the next ten years I better look decent.

So I applied makeup.

You can’t wear too much in a photo but just enough to highlight your features.

What I forgot was that passport photo booths wash you out! They strip back all the effort and I was left looking, well, like a psycho.

For the next ten years!

I redid it 6 times.

I looked awful in all of them! So I picked the best of a rotten bunch.

This photo will haunt me for the next ten years but hey ho.

At least I get to keep my European passport if this crappy brexit ever does happen.

I look like a pyscho

I should have applied more makeup!

But I am a proud European!