Me, myself and I

Before I go to sleep at night I day dream about different lives I could live. This is not me wanting to leave my life, this is just pure fantasy. Like creating a perfect film staring me. It normally ends with me and Josh Brolin living happily in the future.

In my own head it starts with nothing, either my partner cheats on me or I get fired, or I quit my high end job.

I do find it’s strange that in my fantasies they alway begin with heartache and disappointment.

That must say something about me.

Then I buy a run down house and do it up, I start over in a career I like that I turn into an awesome career in social media or I am a painter. These are generally my two careers in my head.

I strip the house back to its roots and imagine the tiles, paint choices and the restoration processes that need to go ahead. While this is happening. I work, fall in in love and plant the perfect garden.

It’s just me, myself and I. I have arguments, get disappointed, relay trust issues. It’s all rather bizarre typing it out loud. I disappear into myself and create a beautiful home with a loving partner, lots of animals and plants and a career I am proud of.

4 good goals, 2.5 I have achieved ( I need more pets and plants)

But why so negative.

Why drama and failure, why when I choose to run away with my thoughts do I not get everything I desire. In my head I am slimmer and my hair is always perfect curls ( goodbye frizz) but why do I do it to myself. Why can’t my fantasies be perfect or is it know that life is work and you put it what you get out?

I am listening to an audiobook at the moment about positivity and how it really affects everything. So maybe I should start looking at my life and my fantasies differently.

This feels like the start of a journey…..

About DP

Hi, I am Dana. I am dyspraxic trying to function and get organised in my dysfunctional world. I don’t shy away from technology but I do have a preference for all things paper and analog. I am trying to organise our lives through my bullet journal, travel around the globe and save money!!! Impossible I know. I have a hard time believing that you should spend a fortune on one day. So, with my creative skills and frugality I will hopefully create my dream wedding without getting into debt. My bullet journal has been a life saver, so much that I now have 3. One for life, one for wedding planning and my last for this blog. I am lost without them. I have a wonderful partner, two fur babies ( Manhattan and Frank) a full time job that I love and my love of blogging. Please bear with me with my spelling and grammar I do proof read about 4 times but I still miss things. I won’t be offended if you correct me. So that’s me, I draw and teach art to both kids and adults and I believe anyone can create anything you just have to practice. I have had to try and try at organising, that is why I am the Dysfunctional Planner.

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