Dysfunctional Planner

Last month was hard

So hard

I have never felt so low for so long, January blues 1, me 0.

I still functioned, still went to work, but my energetic levels were so low. I felt in the edge of tears all the time. I just want to be held and left alone at the same time. The sofa became my best friend again, offering me support and keeping me sedated.

I bored myself.

I can’t quite believe how low I felt. I let things slide, my house dissolved into a complete mess. I paid little attention to myself and I just didn’t care. Not finding the route of the problem was pissing me off.

I pissed myself off.

I think it was a combination of two things. I think I was suffering from S.A.D seasonal affective Disorder which means that the grey sky’s and lack of sunlight where making me unhappy but also my diet didn’t help. SAD is about a lack of melatonin that you normally.

I had an apple today and realised that unless there was fruit in my dessert I hadn’t had fresh fruit since November! The Pink Lady I had today was joyful and refreshing. I also ate too much take out and processed food. This isn’t good, it didn’t help my mental state.

What did I learn

That next year I am going eat better.

Give up Diet Coke except if I am on holiday or socialising.

Exercise more but also I won’t be so hard on myself.

S.A.D is a real thing and I am allowed to be blue.

I had a few really shit days. And that’s okay because I am getting through this. I got through it. Next year I will be better prepared!

Any tips for getting through the winter months will be greatly appreciated!