Dysfunctional Planner

Okay this is just a little blog to sum up the last few months. I have mentioned before that I have worked throughout all this so I haven’t had a break at all. That’s about to change but I will get to that later.

1. A whitewashed life

I mentioned in my last blog that I live a multicultural life, my family our friends. But over the past few weeks it is become apparent that my life is still whitewashed and I have much to learn. It also starts with my family and learning a bit more about the past.

Systemic racism doesn’t have a place in the world so it’s time to oust it.

2. Family is everything

I know this is obvious but it is. My parents live in different countries so I am used to not seeing them but it still make you think about the separation and worrying about them and there health.

I wish I could be with them but keeping them safe is more important. I can’t imagine getting on a plane right now. So I am resolved to texts and zoom for now.

I miss my family and friends so much.

I wouldn’t want to miss them more.

3. Frank therapy has helped

I really couldn’t have gotten through this without my dog. Having a pet and something to adore you has been a gift. I have to put his needs before my own, he gets fed before us, get cuddles and walked once a day.

The walking has helped, get me and Gav out of house to the local park. It’s a pretty empty park so we never come into contact with anyone.

Having a dog has been wonderful I hope I never take him for granted.

4. Baking is a skill

I know it’s a bit of a joke that banana bread is lockdown prerequisite but we love it. It took me 3 failed banana breads before I bought scales. Baking is a skill and it’s so important to have the correct measurements and not add or take away.

The fourth banana bread was perfect and was so good. Since then I made a gin and tonic lemon drizzle cake… so good. A coffee cake which had a strange icing but I am confident now.

I can bake.. oh and I made very rich brownies.

Baking is a skill.

5. The kitchen is never tidy

With baking and having 3 meals at home everyday the kitchen is constantly a mess and needs tidying. It is draining me, I feel like I am going mad. I hate cleaning at the best of times. Eventually when I start working again, we will save for a new kitchen.

I refuse to get a new kitchen without a dishwasher. I refuse. I would rather not have a washing machine I would rather have a dishwasher.

Lock down has made my kitchen dreams become focused.

6. I love gardening

So having a dog means your garden always needs a bit of attention, mainly cleaning but also tending my flowers. When I tried to grow my own bouquet last year.

This year my dahlias are growing back and I am elated. I also have some tomatoes and peppers growing too. Home grown tomatoes are the best and I can’t wait to have our own.

Gav is researching smoking and bbqing at the moment. So when it’s nice we cook outside and spend more time in the garden.

7. Korean films are amazing

We have been watching a few Korean films and Netflix series and now I am a little obsessed with Korea.

We watched the Kingdom with is a perfect Zombie series that we loved.

This has made us look at more series and we are now watching the Magic Pop up Bar..

Now I want to go to Korea, it’s my next country I want to visit.

8. The pounds have been piling

I have been putting on weight, I know this is fine, I am exercising less only walking once a day. Eating more I guess.

I am not happy with it so it’s time for me to start running again.

9. Cancelled plans

For Gavins 40th I started saving for a trip to New York. We would go in September so it would be our first anniversary and his birthday treat. COVID-19 has put a stop to this. I understand and I am grateful.

I am grateful that I don’t have to chase my money or that we don’t have to visit another place where everything is shut.

Now me and Gav are planning New York together.

But we won’t be getting on a plane this year.

It is still just to scary.

10. Back to planning

I am back to my bullet journal. I was just working through my day but now I am back to my bullet points, planning out my days and weeks.

I love to write things down. All the apps in the world aren’t going to help me.

Analogue is best for me so I am going to stick with it. Plan my work days ( whilst I still have them) and plan my time when I don’t have work to do.

11. Starting over is daunting

So I had to come to a hard decision. My working wanted me in but I am still shielding Gav. So I had to hand in my notice. It wasn’t an easy choice but we couldn’t come to an agreement. I still think the government is wrong to open up everything so soon.

I hope there is no second peak.

So now I have to start over. I loved my job it was unique I will never get that sort of job again. So now I have to decide what to be when I grow up.

It’s daunting.

I don’t really know where to begin.

What lock down has taught me

I always new how much my friends and family meant to me but I need to let them know more. I miss my freedom but I would miss a dead loved one more. So I am happy to keep isolating to protect everyone.

Everyone has sacrificed during this time and a lot of people have lost so much. So I am happy to learn.

Happy to keep learning and isolating.