Self Help books should not make you feel guilty

Advice, Organising, Personal Experience, Planning

Life can get hectic and we can do a few things to sort our selves out. Have a mini break down, scream and shout, focus on the issue, break it down into manageable chunks or if none of these work then just seek help.

Self help books can aid us in this, if we need them. I have always scoffed at them myself until I read the magic of tidying. But to be honest with you I didn’t know it was a self help book.

I just thought it would help me with tidying!

We shouldn’t feel guilty about being stressed and seeking help

I have a Becky and a Gavin in my life. Two Cancerians who are so to the point and brutal that I have never ventured into the world of self help books. There guidance has been all i needed. When I was struggling about keeping on top of my mess I found this book. But it helped me declutter other parts of my life as well.

Bullet journaling

Time flies when we are struggling

Things can get on top of us quickly, it is called snowballing for a reason and it can get out of hand quickly.

I had a boss who used to say “if you had to, how would you deal with this” his voice is often in my head when i am frustrated in a situation. If I have to fix a situation then how do I even if i feel it is impossible.

If I am not wedding planning on the busthen I am day dreaming about Josh Brolin.

Life gets in the way!

You should never feel guilty

More people are talking about thereanxieties and daily pressures. I think that the best way to deal with things isfirstly to know when you are not being super productive and also knowing whento stop!

I didn’t realise I was reaching for the self-help books until someone said you read a lot of them. I have read a total of 4.

  • The life changing Magic of Tidying (which is a pure joy and I recommend to everyone)
  • Getting your sh*t together (which just repeats itself constantly and swears a lot but its 3 main points where good Phone wallet and Keys)
  • An Edited Life by Anna Newton
  • An ebook about blogging…..

Two of these are more about organizing butthey are still self-help books.

Same message in Each Book

If you have ever read a self help book you will find that they are extremely repetitive, i think that half of it is to get the message across and the other half is just filling pages. But the message is generally always the same. The main one being…. What do you want out of life, what do you hope to achieve.

It’s a bit tricky when you are not sure what you want. Or even what I don’t want. There are certain things that I do want but are they goals or have i just watched too many Instagram posts and my favourite Youtubers?

 I would like more pennies in my account at the end of the month. A healthy looking Savings account. A new kitchen oh yes, a bathroom upstairs. A Chloe handbag, travel a lot more. explore more of great Britain because it gets torn apart in this Brexit fiasco.

Ironically saving for the wedding means that I have realised how much money I can save. At the moment I am saving a bit too much to have a decent life balance however, I can still save easily 10% of my wage every month. So I will.

I can make this change

I can save for a Chloe bag……

I would like a better kitchen. I love myhouse, it is pretty perfect. Do I wish it was bigger? yes. But we have a 3bedroom house ( no I don’t want children) but if I did change my mind therewould be room to cage them (joke). I meant cage one (still joking). I wouldlike a kitchen that opens onto the garden rather than a bathroom that looksover the garden. Our savings have proved that we can actually afford this andafter the wedding and honeymoon this is what I will be looking into. I am not havingbig dreams of a designer kitchen I just require things like a surface next tothe sink. A dishwasher. None of these things fit in my perfectly sized if not awee bit small kitchen. All this could change!

All self-help books ask you to do is figure out what you want. But honestly I like my life and my job. I would love to work less and travel more.

Self Help conclusion

Self help books are there as a guide to aid you in your quest (you are on one or you wouldn’t have picked it up). You shouldn’t feel guilty if A, you don’t achieve what you wanted or B, it doesn’t work for you c, you think that the author maybe nuts or just a money grabber (ebook about blogging that I don’t want to list)

I heard recently that people read or listen to self help guides but they don’t follow it to the letter then get disappointed by the lack of results. So this chap said follow what they say and try it for however long and then tweak it. Don’t get half was through tidying and think I can listen to music… or watch Netflix ( sorry Marie Kondo) because she is right it is distracting.

There is nothing wrong with personal development. Trying to find what works with and for you. There is also nothing wrong with following your own advice.

Its like a bad relationship…You are only ready to move on with your life when you are ready to move on with your life. Knowing better and being able to physically remove yourself from a loved one are too different things.

Been there done that, wore the heartbreak tshirt.

So never let anyone mock you for reaching for a self help book. Knowing you a problem or are just stuck in a rut is a positive step. But also don’t feel guilty if they don’t work, don’t make sense or a a piece of Crap.

I love my self help books.

I love organising and planning- I also love reading and watching people do the same.

What books Self-Help books have you read and loved…or hated.

2 thoughts on “Self Help books should not make you feel guilty

  1. I totally get how some self-help books can be repetitive. Recently purchased a book called “Blogging for Dummies” which might be considered a self-help book or not. I always felt anxious going into the “Self-Help” section of Barnes & Nobles. But I’ve gotten past that, and after reading your blog, I realized that it’s normal to purchase such books. Also, I really enjoyed reading the part “no, I don’t want children”. As I state the same to my family every weekend or so. Great read! Thank you for sharing. 👍🏽

    Like

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